How to Beat the Winter Blues

By Caroline Jobson

  1. Consume unlimited amounts of pumpkin spice and or peppermint infused concoctions.
  2. Attempt to recreate a beach scene [indoors of course!]. Sport your best summer-colored sarong while having calypso music playing in the background — an umbrella adorned drink wouldn’t hurt either.
  3. Apply self-tanner while attributing it to a tropical weekend getaway. A better solution than wishful thinking to the cold weather? Envy.
  4. Quell your tears with ice cream. After hearing of California’s record heat wave, why not enjoy an appropriately frigid treat. You know what they say, if you can’t beat them, join them — which of course should entail desserts.
  5. Embrace it. If 60 is the new 40, then why can’t -7°F be the new 35°F? If your grandma has been lying about her age all these years, then shouldn’t we be able to manipulate the temperature to our liking?
  6. Experiment with the latest Eskimo fashions. Incorporate cozy fur hides into normally woolen scarves, caps, and mittens.
  7. Take comfort in the fact that the soon Olympian overrun Sochi is experiencing similar weather. Perhaps the 2020 Olympics is on Cleveland’s horizon. Nope…Detroit’s chances seems to be looking better.
  8. Stock up on chocolate. It should temporarily lighten your winter blues. If ineffective, combine with binge-watching of reality TV. You don’t have to confront the weather if your eyes are glued to Juan Pablo’s [most recent bachelor] face, right?
  9. All jokes aside, rest assured warm weather is fast approaching. Only three more months to go before Ms. Day’s short short radar begins encroaching.